Already the 3rd week of Advent?! Alas, yes. Back to reality, and where reality has hit, and more significantly, where I have accepted reality, by letting reality “be” reality. Enter back in intentionality, living in the present moment, mindfully. How? By healing first. Healing the mental mind, the physical body, giving it back what it deserved, putting away the over-worked brain and abolished physiological system. It came about unideally by literally running out of time, prioritising the overdue must-dos and trying to do it whilst travelling. I have found this to be unconducive, and do not travel well whilst working. After they were completed by force, the mind became slightly more relaxed in terms of tasks completed, however it took a week to “recover” doing some left-over tasks on the holiday too, which resulted in not being completely at ease. I have learnt this for the first time on this trip, however as tasks are not mentally taxing it was more a nuisance than anything, but did prevent me from my usual soaking in of pleasant holiday surroundings. Fast forward and amongst all of that was ironically rushing an Advent Reflection (week 1 plus week 2 combined too as it was past!) and hey that does not sound like what the Advent season is meant to be about too! Finally. After a week of working (work + personal tasks) on the holiday, I have ended up reset and mentally and physically refreshed to start over! There’s the backlog of social circle and personal development and growth that has been neglected, however, there is much to be learnt through this very experience, and do I unravel it, or do I pause, reflect and move on?

Super ironic huh that this is happening during Advent, the time to take stock of the year, reflect, contemplate peacefully and anticipate Our Saviour. And this is even after unmaterialising and unconsuming Christmas for a few years now. It shows how different it is from season to season, with what is brewing in our hearts and souls, and how close and open our hearts and souls have been toward God this year, even if I had been excited in anticipation of Advent this year after revelations in the LRBM retreat. The distraction by the world was way too easy than clinging onto what is above, unseen and eternal – faith was weak, flesh was weak too.

There were definitely pockets of peace in all this, and much a plenty to have gratitude for, with the abundances of graces, recognised always afterward on hind sight and here comes a wee reminder for me to do my daily examen again. Perhaps it was the guilt that was more overwhelming of my own behaviour that has been suboptimal, blaming dryness in prayer – did I even try hard enough after the Sacrament of Reconciliation and Healing? And on Penitentiary Service this Advent, I knew I was going to miss this, and had thought of going for confession at SMOTA before heading to Europe, but no surprise, yet again was something I had in my mind but did not accomplish before leaving! Where were my priorities?! It has also started to disturb me that I’ve not prepared anything in terms of outreach for the poor and needy too this season. Maybe there will be an opportunity later, and in the meantime I pray that I can give of myself more in an attentive outreach to others.

So in being able to slow down much more easily in the western northern hemisphere, I have much gratitude for 2 obvious things that occurred by the grace of God: 1) confession with an old, very sweet, warm, merciful Italian priest in the Duomo in Parma (sudden) 2) attending Sunday Mass being very near our hotel in Bologna though we woke up late and right in front where we chose to sat was one single piece of the liturgy pamphlet for the day to follow. There are 2 more things I have so much gratitude for and they are the safety walking in the slippery icy slopes and that being in the UK and Italy time has slowed by half – after 2 days past, it felt like 4 or more, and after a week past, it felt like a fortnight! It is obvious now I will be recollective and spend time to reflect now I have a clear mental state and capacity to do so. In that, I am also most grateful for this state of mind to be able to do this! Gratitude journalling with reflections may come more naturally, and this is the first time doing it from my laptop instead of my phone.

I take from this year, something to learn for the next, when challenges fall wayward, and that is what a dear friend said to me, when trouble started to happen this year: “when times are challenging, pray double”

To move forward, a reminder from an infographic received for 3 things to say No to during Advent:

• Overcommitting – by spending part of the weekend in nature, we can give ourselves time and space to connect meaningfully with our loved ones and to give thanks to Christ who came to save us
• Perfection – instead of placing so much emphasis on coming up with gifts that look very professional, saying now to perfectionism leads us to a simpler, more restful Advent
• Excessive spending – less time spent shopping the crowded malls and fussing over fancy gifts means more time spent quietly at home. Try giving presence over presents

Rejoice in the Lord always – 3rd Sunday of Advent

Got this reflection to remind us:

God our Father, we thank you for the gift of your Son, Jesus, who is the best gift you have given to us. Your care Father, is vividly shown through Jesus. Help us to prepare ourselves well to receive him with grateful hearts. It is easy to lose sight of the true meaning of what we are celebrating but with your grace, may our wait be fruitful as you have promised. God our Father, you have showed us that they only way to experience authentic joy is in, through and with you. Grant us vision and patience amidst our trials so as not to miss your words of comfort. May we also be angels of light during this season to those in darkness by sharing your love and mercy. Forgive us Lord and grant us the grace to truly experience the authentic joy this Christmas as we lay our dreams and our hurts at your feet. Amen.

My reflection

The theme of joy has been so prevalent working up to the 3rd week of Advent and I believe this has culminated wonderfully (in awe of God again!) in peace and freedom experienced at this very moment! It is only God’s perfect timing and perfect plan. The Italian confessor in Duomo di Parma (whom I think said) God knows our poverty and when we respond to Him he is happy and full of joy to welcome us back with warm hugs cos he loves us, and the celebrant in Parrochia di San Giovanni Battista in Bologna where he said our joy will be complete in God. He spoke about joy so many times and the part understood was the testimonies we should talk about, to spread the joy of the Gospel. For me, this resounds greatly, to go back to this, as then this life is not about ourselves anymore, but the Christ who lives in us. I pray for much deeper humility, meekness, prudence in all I think, say, do and to be less vocal, and more assertive in my actions than my words. I have felt Jesus, Our Lady, and our Saints to be stronger in my intercession lately, helping me along in my prayer life. Thanks be to God.

NCC - do you see the Lord providing indirect answers in your community and do you rejoice to see the Lord's hand in the community's struggles?

I would say yes, he has worked in our community gradually, some of us have heard and answered his call to help us make changes that have been brought forward now into the season of Advent and more importantly, it is a grace to recognise that God’s hand is working in our NCC struggles, and that we continue to make this an enriching NCC to support our community as actively as possible, amidst life’s usual challenges that come our way.